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Carla’s Niche

Carla’s Letter Tapes

CAVEAT: Warning! These letters have not been edited by Carla. Expect errors.

Letter to R

August 11, 1987

Dear R,

I have spent a little bit of time with your stuff and will give you the very best of my ability in so-called criticism of it. I would prefer the term evaluation since it is my earnest belief that no channel is without an audience, at least herself or himself, and, undoubtedly, for any kind of channeling, there is someone who would appreciate it besides yourself. Criticism is not the right word, but I will attempt to evaluate it.

Let me say some things in general and then I will go through the pages and stop where I marked things and see if I can remember why I marked them.

My estimation of the validity of your channeling is that it is about channeling. I believe that you are channeling those deep proportions of the mind, which have a tendency to be called the higher self, or part of the higher self, or one’s guides or one’s inner teachers. This is in contrast to those thought forms on the inner planes, which have been built up by many who seek a certain vibration. The many people who channel Kuthumi are an example of an objectified part of the deeper self. I don’t believe that it makes any difference how we think of these things, but I think that it may help you if I give you the clear estimate that I believe that you are channeling that portion of the deep mind, which resonates with the gradual opening of the heart chakra and its crystallization through service.

I say this because one can almost always find some quirk in the name that the contact gives you, unless it is a recognized name like Leonard Withermore, you know or something like that, but in a name like Hertia, for instance, if one just looks at it and lets the mind sag, one immediately comes up with the anagram “I heart. It is my belief that the opening of the heart chakra has led you to a new concept of yourself and a new way to go at understanding yourself, offering yourself to others, and in some cases, using your own armor of light to protect you from others.

You are still a beginning channel. Well I am still a beginning channel. I have only channeled since 1974 and it’s a tremendous art so you are at the beginning of the beginning. I don’t say this to discourage you. If you enjoy the channeling and you get a kick out of helping people, or producing information that might be useful or inspiring to people, then of course you should continue channeling. But keep a good head on your shoulders, no matter what people say to you, because honestly every year I realize more of what I am not yet able to get from my channeling. That by inconsistencies in purities within my meditative state when I go to the level at which I do my work, portions of the message that are put out are missed and until one can channel the whole message, which I suspect has rarely been done, one is not yet a master channeler. But the first step was the hardest and you have already taken that so what you are involved in at this point is the unglamorous, considerably toilsome, at some point, task of being persistent and faithful in your stewardship of your new gift.

I shouldn’t say new because you have been doing this since 1974 as automatic handwriting. However, you have only begun to refine in any true sense this gift in the last year or two, right? And I believe that you are capable of going pretty much where you want to with it. I don’t really know if you are going to be interested in being a philosophic channel. If you wish to channel specific and personal information, you will need at some point to obtain contact with part of what is known as the Akashic record. These Akashic record type contacts can call themselves Michael or Lazarus or anything else, but the key note is that they do give personal information. It is more egoistic fun to channel personal information. It is, in my estimation, of more general aid to the planet to channel general information having to do with the evolution of mind, body and spirit throughout eternity.

I have chosen to be a philosophic channel and not to attempt the kind of contact with inner planes, which would produce reliably helpful information for people on a personal level. I will say this: If you hope to make a living from channeling, do not become a philosophic channel. There are few people on this planet who, when they have a personal problem, want to ask the question philosophically and get general guidelines on what they might consider as they look at the task of what they do. Most people when they want to deal with a personal problem or situation, want to know when, where, what, why, who and how? So I don’t want to prejudice you either way. I have known many people who say they have been enormously helped by them that are personal channels. It is my belief that this is a kind of channeling practice that has too many problems.

The first is that you make people very dependent upon you so that they stop doing their work and think only of coming back to R, who will have the answer for everything. They just can’t wait to get to you. It is very ego-salving. It feels good, that is, if you like people. If you are a loner like me, that would get to be a terrible burden. It is very lucrative and I believe that you are capable of such a channel.

The other problem is that some of what you see contains deep ethical questions as to what you say about it. Moreover because of the subtlety of these ethical questions, one step wrong and you are vibrating at an off-tuned vibratory rate. In other words, your tuning has drifted from the radio station of your very good contact, which is protected and blessed. Drifted off by the ethical lax or excesses, something that you have done or not done that isn’t quite so; isn’t quite as good. Maybe you’ve added a little something to what you heard, whatever. One never knows, but what I am saying is, this kind of contact is deeply vulnerable to being taken over by those entities within the inner planes—that is, those portions of your own deep mind and their projections, in an eternal sense, not just while you are alive.

What you project in an incarnation remains and the more you have projected it, the more firmly it remains. Then if others begin projecting it too, it eventually becomes an ever-lasting vibration so you can lose your channel and end up being quite discredited, of course, because you are giving incorrect information and nothing comes through, etc. Then the typical person to whom this is happening becomes rather embittered, etc. I have seen this happen and it is a shame, and it is trickier ethically to deal with the personal questions.

I think you are up to it. I think you are a neat lady and a hip one as far as those kinds of questions are concerned and you’ll do everything in your power, so don’t let me close that door for you because of my admitted bias towards philosophical channeling.

It would be my suggestion that you attempt to gather a group of at least two other people who are very supportive of you, once a week, for the exercise of your channel. I personally practice every day with Jim for about three or four minutes and I have a session every Sunday night to which anybody from anywhere is invited. It is totally open. We get mostly out-of-town folks. Luckily, I am obscure in this place. Nobody bothers us. Nobody looks up to us or anything. It is really nice because then we can get on with living the kind of life that most benefits a channel, which is a very peaceful hermit-like existence.

I know this may be hard for you, but once you have made the breakthrough into channeling, once you have made the channel make sense, etc., there is only practice, rehearse. You just keep practicing and keep practicing. Honest, I have done it every week since 1974, and on my honeymoon I was away from it for three Sundays and when I got back to it, I was as rusty as an old nail. And I really couldn’t hack the sustained channeling that everybody has come to expect from me. Last week I channeled for an hour and half. I was down pretty deep because I did not get tired and didn’t know that the time had passed at all. We didn’t get it on tape, unfortunately, because the question was about people who want to be Christian, but can’t stand the fact that Jesus said the only way into heaven was by him. That you couldn’t believe in anybody else. You just had to believe in him and also the fact that people generally thought that because Jesus Christ was crucified, we were all okay and we didn’t have to worry about our salvation. It was all laid on for us. And that didn’t seem right.

I channeled an hour and half on it. It must have been; Jim said it was some of the best channeling he had ever heard, but then you know, the family is always biased one way or the other—either for you or against, depending on the climate of the family. But our tape recorder mysteriously malfunctioned, so what else is new? We got the dating of the tape and we got the question on the tape and that was it. Everything else is blank. I guess we weren’t supposed to have it anyway.

I think I’ll start going through this now. Pardon all the rustlings of papers and also the guy mowing the lawn next door. I am sitting here with my chocolate bar, my little Himalayan kitty cat, pretty little thing, flighty, jumpy, clumsy. I am hoping that you can still hear me as I am putting the microphone under my arm.

The first reading that you got on April 8, 1987, you have a note: We are known as Alwheim, very close to Elohim, which is some kind of Hebrew angel. Interesting correspondence. I thought that that boded well for your channeling because even way back then, what you were getting indicated, at least in my opinion because of the misspelling, not only an angelic contact, that is, that part of your higher self, which is very positive, but also one with a sense of humor because the way it looks like it is pronounced, it comes out with a German pronunciation. Aloheim. And I find little jokes like that to be indicative of a good stable channel. It is the ones who are overly serious, lord of this and master of that and all of that stuff, commander this and you have seen them. Those you have to watch.

For instance, one of my favorite contacts named himself Oxal. Well, that is obviously Oxidal. All he was saying was that he was white. He was clean.

Before the batch that you sent me, which began in May, you were actually getting more of an intellectual contact than later in this series of channeling. For instance, you channel on tape 3, April 8, “Love is the higher form of your being. Free will exists always in every form within disciplines. That is the nature of creation.” I believe that this is very central to a metaphysical scheme of things and fits in perfectly with the metaphysical scheme of things that contacts have given other channels. Love, of course, being that great thought, which brought everything into being, and to which everything will eventually be drawn again and will be absorbed. Love in the sense of (inaudible), the Indian phrase or word or logos, as in John when he said, “In the beginning was the Word.” Logos, well that logos is Love defined so specifically in the Ra material, for instance, which was the best contact I have ever had.

Now a note that you said, “This seemed very heavy. So I said, ‘Please give me something light here. I am tired and wish to laugh.’” Immediately you got a very light little ditty, “Hagger, hinder, dinder do, etc.” and encouragement to join the all within, and join the universe, the all without, and be delightful. I believe this may be hampering your work at this time. If you wish to do philosophical channeling, you will have to be prepared to work with concepts, which are sometimes on the cumbersome side, or heavy, or chewy because the points they are making have to do with the illusion and its relationship to the Spirit working on itself to evolve; especially things that deal with free will. Free will, as far as I know, is the ultimate, the number one priority in ethical considerations and it turns so many things 180 degrees so that the most helpful thing to do for someone, or for yourself, is 180 degrees different from what you may think it to be because of free will, You just need to give people, or yourself, advice and then relax and sink down into a more centered state-of-mind.

Later on, on this same page, you say, “There was a problem with dissipating the energy and I heard that this energy should not be wasted. It should be used in healing.”

Rinaldo said, “Send it to a hospital,” but as far as I am concerned, this lacks the proper punch unless you know somebody at the hospital, or unless you have an extremely vivid imagination. It is difficult to send in general. We do, and it is just a suggestion, but it is all I know. I don’t know what other people do. I really haven’t found out a lot from other channels yet, and I am looking forward to the book coming out so that I’ll start getting more of a general idea of what other people besides me have done with these questions.

What we do is we have a list that I keep in my head of a just a few people who are very dear to the group and have serious health problems, either mentally or physically. Then after, it is obvious when it is over. “It is not over till it’s over.” When it’s over, and I do occasionally get an entity called Nona, who is with the Confederation of Planets in Service to the Infinite Creator. It is a very feminine energy and her only contact is for healing and she will just barely be able to get out. She is very breathy and she says, “I am Nona and I greet you in the love and light of the Infinite Creator and we have been called for healing.” And then she’ll just start singing, not words. Just ahs and oohs, like that and sometimes it will be lots of running notes, lots of tinkley little notes and runs, and sometimes it will be one tone and then another tone, but almost inevitably someone in the group will say, “Well, I didn’t say this yet, but so and so is ill.” Or, “I have been having trouble.”

There is almost always a reason that Nona is there. Sometimes it is with the larger portion of my meditation group, that is, people who have gone to all corners of the earth, but who still manage to sit down and meditate at 8 o’clock on Sunday nights because they know that is when I meditate on Sunday nights. And they like that feeling of tapping into that energy and being part of that light.

And one time it was S in Denver who needed a healing and we didn’t know and she wanted Nona to give her some help and we didn’t know this, of course, until afterwards.

Just a note, on 4-10-87 you got the message, “Go forth and teach your brothers.” I see this as a central point in the initiation of a teacher. It happened to Don and me during a very interesting séance. Moses walked through us a couple of times and disappeared into a pool on the floor and did other interesting things, but his message to Don and me was, “Go forth and teach.” So apparently you are being given the blessing of your own deeper nature and of those teachers who have objective inner plane form who will help you. So, things look very favorable. I am feeling much better about your channeling than I did when you were being awakened in the middle of the night and you were putting down words that didn’t make any sense at all.

Now you have here some notes on challenging right after you got, “I am Hertia,” You had said, “What may I call you. Please identify yourself.” I would like to iterate that when you are challenging, challenge in the name of not just God because there is a loophole in that one. God is the god of those on the positive side and those on the negative side, of those who wish to aid others and those who wish to aid themselves. I am assuming that because of the inner knowing that you have with what you mean by God, you are basically protected, but I believe that it would be well if you would always, since you understand and buy into Christ, or Christ consciousness, that you say, “I challenge you in the name of God in Christ consciousness or in Christ.” That will absolutely seal the door against those of negative persuasions who don’t like that vibe at all and they may come from God, but they don’t come from Christ’s part.

Also the place where you challenge is poor. You have already allowed messages to come through you: some text to be put on the tape coming through you before you say, “What may I call you and for what purpose are you here?” All of those are very good, but let me clear up what may be confusion. When you are challenging, you are not just challenging with words. There is a difference between words such as “Christ consciousness” and the building of those words into a significant, palpable image of light within yourself, which you may hold as a standard, and as a shield and as your own personality in the world of invisible spirits. You must make a purified emotion about Christ consciousness your own so that when you say, “Who comes in the name of God in Christ consciousness, which I serve with all of my heart, all of mind, all of my soul and all of my strength?” that query is one purified emotion. An intelligent emotion. It is like a thought laser and it blasts through like no mere words ever could.

Every time you do this with an intensity of heart and desire to be pure, you will build this personality of yours. I call it the magical personality, the adept personality, so that more and more you will be able to challenge quite briefly, but with great intensity. Then you can get, “I am Hertia.” But challenge before the words come.

I guess I am kind of a nut on control, but I figure once you begin channeling you are in another state of consciousness. I am. I am sure you are out of it. There is a lot of energy coming through and rolling around, but it doesn’t have a lot to do with me and I pretty well go to sleep. Not completely because I am not doing trance channeling right now, but I get down pretty deep.

Your ability to be a fastidious channel and get the very best contact that you can is enhanced far more by your challenging before you actually get the contact, then in attempting to kind of mend fences after the channeling begins.

I believe on 4-10-87 you got a very good contact. The key phrases, “Man is a creation. To man we say, become. Man is an embellishment of the godhead. See within the realms inside yourself. Join with fellowman.” This is the basic message that you will get. One thing is missing and I find this interesting and I ask you to consider with me, why it is happening. My belief, my uneducated, ignorant presumptuous belief is, and please excuse my presumption, that it is perhaps the lack of love that you receive and the love that you are unable to truly give to Walter because of his estrangement from you, his behavior towards you etc. that at this point in your life, you don’t believe in love basically. Or you would like to believe in love, but you find the word a bit trite compared to what you are going through now. And you rely instead on expansion and words like gentleness, kindness and upliftment, etc. It is a kind of hole in your channeling.

Another thing that it might be also is that at this stage of your channeling, you are basically talking baby talk and more about that when I come to it. Please don’t think that I am attempting to demean your channeling. It is just that when you begin, you begin.

Here is another good part from 4-10-87: “We share in the light of joy and in the darkness of knowingness.” This is a very archetypal two-faced point made by many other channels and, of course, the theologians, for instance. The Christian sower and seed parable has to do with the tremendous ability of the seed in the darkness of the earth to grow and flourish and ultimately spring forth into the light to be joyful and to share and to be glorious, but the archetypal point here is that the souls act always in darkness and unknowingness. It does say darkness of knowingness, but I would have been surprised if you could have gotten unknowingness and that is advanced channeling.

Now the channel that you are getting is the channel that you requested when you said, “Give me something a little lighter.” So you were getting, “Simplicity is the utmost of existence. There is no great mystery.” This will be helpful for those who are over-complicating everything. So you are, even at this point in your channeling, giving helpful information.

On 4-15-87 you speak of the balance between positive and negative elements. That is an excellent concept and is part of the kinds of things that one gets. In your channeling about the sun, you got the color yellow. As far as I know, yellow is psychologically helpful to those who need more hope, so it was a good channeling there. Another metaphase principle comes up on page 4 when you say, “Consciousness requires nothing more than the soul of allowance to reach forward in time and choose as desirable those things that appears to happiness.” Now unfortunately the channeling that you were getting has a tendency to just use a lot of sort of high sounding words, you’d say, but the concept is “Seek and ye shall find.” Reach forward in time, seek, and choose of its own desires. And, of course, thrusting in this manner over and over again, the creature, the entity creates true happiness. In other words, if you really do seek, you really will find. You have to be careful what you seek. That is so true. What you find, you may not like it.

I like your care at setting the stage for your meditations. Whatever helps you get tuned is what is needed. Anything beyond that is superfluous and anything less than that is careless. I like your opening and you do have here, “I walk in the consciousness of the Christ.” Now after you say, “I am surrounded with the light, I am ready to work, and before you say, “Allow, allow, allow,” or perhaps instead or perhaps after, I don’t know what your psychology needs, what your mind is set up for, but be sure and say, “Who comes in the name of God and Christ consciousness, which I serve with all of my heart. all my soul.”

You could say it just as thoroughly as you want and then when you get, “I am Hertia” or “I am Fred” or whatever, then you say, “Do you come in the light of Christ consciousness?” Whatever you want to challenge for and then again, mentally Hertia or whoever has the say, “I am Hertia. Yes, my child, yes entity,” whatever yours says. Please be careful with that because you are sensitive and you will pick something up.

Now I notice that you have a change of voice between that portions of the channeling in which there is some intellectual content. For instance, “The simplicity of the self appears as a vast maze and yet the simplicity of self is only be.” That is one of the great spiritual paradoxes actually and then later, “Be all that you are.” Very simple words, yet it leads man to think about who he really is. Not just be all that you are, but, the simplicity of self appears as a vast maze and yet is simple. You know, the intellectual content is actually better in these earlier sessions and then when the voice changes to the higher pitch, then comes the little love bunny that makes everybody feel good, which is very valuable channeling of a kind.

Of course, it is like eating cotton candy to a metaphysician because it says enjoy, smile, be happy, all that is, that which is, all that seems, that which is not, etc. This is not bad, but it is without depth. Those words bring forth an instantaneous change in the consciousness of those hearing the words and if you want to take a group of people and really make them feel good, channel for about fifteen minutes in the light voiced vibration, which is part of your heart, you see. You will have this whenever you want.

This is a beautiful vibration, but if you want to develop a body of written channeled material that will become a book, and you want to do better than the “Ramtha” book, for instance, which was lacking in metaphysical content also, then these are the consideration you need to make.

I want to tackle your contacts’ use of the English language. I have some things circled on May 9. I probably have a lot of things circled that I won’t have to because things occur again and again. Look at the top of page 2, May 9th. “With this ever enhancement of your light, fears shall be cast out, knowledge shall be drawn in, upliftment and upholdment of self,” and all of these ments. It is just amazing how many channels have used that kind of word. It is a word that quite often is “initiationment” or something like that. You will use words that sound a little better than the everyday word. This is not actually necessary and in written form especially it qualifies as a distraction. Also I have no objection to Hertia using the second person intimate, which is archaic in this language, but used in church, of course, and in the King James version of the Bible. But I want you, if you wouldn’t mind, to study until you have got it, the declension of thou and thee and thy and thine.

Thou is used where you would have a subject, like thou art R. It is not thee art R or it is not thy art R. It is thou. But when you are using it as an object, R made thee her friend. R did not make thy her friend nor did she make thou her friend. That is an object and when you use thy, you use it the same way that you use a and an. You use thy house, but you use thine own house. In other words, thy when it begins with a consonant and thine when it begins with a vowel. If you use them sloppily or if it is given to you sloppily, and it would tear up your concentration to correct the language when it comes out, I think it is perfectly acceptable to correct the grammar before publishing.

In all of your answers to people, I notice that you really were attempting, or the channel was attempting, to be a general and philosophical answer, going beyond the kind of channeling where you got those numbers for your husband’s water pipe problems, which I applaud, and I hope that it does help the people.

Here you come to a theme. See mixed in these channeling are images that don’t work and images that do. In the same paragraph, at the bottom of the paragraph on page 4, May 21, “As are pearls to the oyster, so are flowers to my hand.” Pearls are to the oyster as thorns to thy hand because the oyster produces the pearl after much irritation from sand getting in the way and that creates. Flowers to be like pearls in the hand would have to irritate the hand in some way, but you see, your contact at this point is getting away with easy words, but you are still channeling. You really are. You shouldn’t doubt and I don’t think you do anymore. “Know that you are God and in your Godhood comes the responsibility of sharing Godhood with your fellowman.” That is a very succinct statement of positive service to others’ metaphysics. That is very good.

So you have all kinds of potential here and it is just sheer practice, R, that is going to clean it up and more and more give what you hope to give in service-to-others and that is the inspirational words that feel good and make sense. You have a beautiful statement here on page 7 of May 21, “Within the pain of thine eyes is the forgetfulness of thy purpose.” That is very succinct. When we are involved in the pain of the moment, we couldn’t possibly remember our purpose, which is always to love,” and you say it right here. “Thy purpose being radiance, radiance of pure love of thy being in touching all that surrounds thee.” Excellent.

When you start with the ongoingness and unfoldment and other words like that, I always get stopped by them. I heard tapes of Ramtha and I heard the tapes late of Mafu and both of them have these most irritating habits or tricks of vocabulary. They both say “indeed” a lot. “Indeed, as it were,” is Ramtha’s specialty and Mafu does a lot of “indeed, in your, as it is termed, life,” etc. “As it is termed,” and, “As it is called,” and, “Indeed.” It keeps coming out and it is a very mannered and not a particularly informative channel. It is obviously a channel and it is obviously a channel that draws a certain type of seeker, but it is the type of seeker who really wants the mind taken over by another mind.

Because, I mean, they sound like Marines, you know. Mafu would say, “Indeed,” or “Indeed?” And everyone would shout back, “Indeed!” And what was it that JZ Knight would channel, “Got it?” And all the people would shout back, “Got it.”

They are both channeling feel good, bliss-ninny, as a friend of mine called it, channeling. That you are Love; that is all that you have to know is that you are Love, that you are eternal, that you are all that there is and all that there is, is you. Everything is one and you have only to relax, and smile, and enjoy, and share, and be radiant, etc. and that is so beautiful. It simply does not begin to tackle the question of, “Why should I do it? How should I do it? What are the tools that I can use in doing it?” It does not therefore constitute a serious attempt to create an on-going dialogue with those wiser than we, in our conscious mind, about spiritual evolution, and as far as I am concerned, that is the game.

So you simply need to encourage your contact to offer you as much content as you can safely and in a stable manner carry. And that is also something that you might keep at the back of your mind in the beginning of your tuning. At the end of your tuning, but before you challenge. You say to whatever you perceive the Godhead to be. I know one friend who calls it papa and I call it lord, but “Dear God, give me the highest and best channel that I may carry in a stable and safe fashion.” Because you just don’t want to draw something in that you can’t handle.

I think that I may have said all of the things that I am going to say that are helpful to you. I will just say the things that I thought were good. How is that?

On May 22nd when you channeled, “Send the feathers of healing to this man that he may release into the ethers all tensions built up, which in the past have caused the sore spot,” this is a good metaphysical channeling on a specific question. I like it a lot and it really rang true when you said, “I sing the songs never ending, always enjoyed by man, by gods, by the heavens.” That made me stop because I wondered about the phrase “gods” and then I went back and looked and it said, “into the light we come, not from the light we come,” and this indicates that they were mischievous and in that context I will say that I felt at times you were getting a slightly mixed contact. Not serious because it has not gone on long enough yet, but you need to heal that breach by the use of the Christ consciousness and by your becoming a magical personality, of not loudness. You don’t have to set your mind to mental screaming when you challenge, but a firmness and a very deep sense of yourself as you thrust yourself onto the arena that you have created, into the limelight and you say, “This is who I am. Now can you come in the name of what I would die for?” and you know I have been harping on that forever.

There is only ongoingness on page 2 of 29-87. That is probably May 29th. There is only ongoingness and nothing more. One of those statements that looks good on the surface, but you see, it does not tackle the polarity, which you have spoken of as the channel in the paragraph before. And here is one of those words that drives me nuts. “Allowment”—allowment is a word that is perfectly easy to understand, but it would be nice if one could find a word that is actually a noun. Allowing would probably be my choice. I don’t know how much control you have over all of this. Perhaps you will find out as you attempt to make my, believe me very humble thoughts, just take this on advisement. Don’t use anything that doesn’t feel right. You’ll probably learn just how much you have control over it during that process.

Let me put what I am trying to say in another way. On page 6, in the middle of the nice poem, you say, “Wisdom of the ages,” is fine and quite often you will see knowledge and knowledgement and things like that, but the thing of it is, you never can see what the knowledge consists of because basically what is being advocated by your channel is simple bliss. Be happy, smile, be at one with everyone, expand outward forever, enjoy etc. I take it by expansion that they not only mean literal expansion, but radiance. And that is all very positive, but to speak of the knowledge of yourself as if a totality.

You see it goes in a circle. To get knowledge of yourself, bask in the knowledge of yourself. This is not going to help most seekers who want to sit down and really work on the self once a day or as often as possible. I am surprised that you haven’t gotten anything on meditation because that is the preferred way of getting into the portion of the mind, which does spiritual work, suggested by most of the contacts I’ve seen.

Your contact is more a nature contact, “Surround thyself with the butterflies,” etc. but I think that may be hand-in-hand with your request for light heartedness because nature is most radiant. It says direct this and I don’t know what it is. It is not important when you speak of yourself in the third person as on June 1, 87, “I beseech you to protect this child, all of us to laugh with this child, to give this child that which is needed for the ever outward expansion of thought.” You see, you are expanding the thought and in so doing, drawing in the knowledge that would be beneficial to all of us hearing the same. So you see you have thought and knowledge, but you don’t have any content for that. You just have a feeling. This will help many people, but I hope you don’t feel satisfied with it and just continue.

That wasn’t what I was going to address. What I was going to address is, it is very common for the contact to speak of the channel in the third person. This channel is doing this, this channel is doing that. This channel would do well to… Very common and, of course, you didn’t feel bothered by it because you were channeling it. No problem there. I have an X marked in the “between the all of everything.” That is one of my favorite bliss phrases of your whole thing. That says less than anything I’ve read lately. Not your fault. You are just channeling.

Another thing I would like to comfort you on is that I knew a man, Don, who also saw, not pictures, but waking visions of a planet and so forth, places on the planet, but he said all of the colors were three-dimensional and were living. They weren’t like the colors here. He said it was like being in a black and white movie all of your life and then suddenly waking up to color, and he was just thrilled by his visions. I would say that this is something that is truly happening.

Our phone has gone crazy. A guest that we had over the weekend thinks that it is being bugged because apparently that is something that happens to phones that are being bugged, but if anybody is bugging us, I sure feel sorry for them having to listen to my conversations.

Good on one level, wanting on another. Wanting in content. On the other hand, right in the middle of this, an excellent paragraph: “It is in thy delicacy, in thy vulnerability where true Love may be found, where gusto may be found, where enthusiasm and spirit may be found, to play this game called life.” A good use of simile, a good clear projection of a complex thought in one simple sentence. It usually feels that one needs to go with one’s strong points. That one needs to put on the mask and position oneself in as safe a way as possible and then one can give. That is, of course, not so. It is in losing your boundaries with other people for the purposes of compassion and understanding where they are that you help, and it is in allowing yourself to be overshadowed by that great mystery.

It bothers me when you say, “The nature of existence is ongoingness,” and nothing more. I want that contact to talk about the central mystery of the Godhead. We are not getting in your channeling yet a full picture of the Creator. We are getting a picture of what it is to be in creation, so just keep asking for content.

On June 4, 87, you were asking, “Should I trust this person or that person?” You know that is a toughie. I have never found it to be very helpful to me to work with people who had their own agenda. I’ve found it very helpful to work with people anywhere in any situation, which was basically acceptable. People wanted to have a channeling and everyone was in agreement of that. It doesn’t matter if it is not your group. You don’t have to be exclusive at all, but the group needs to want to hear you speak. If the group has come to hear you help somebody else, then things get a little twisted around.

I enjoyed your Susie Jane. You really are a psychic. You don’t need the phenomena to tell you that. Here is what I consider mixed contact. 6-22-87, “The ongoingness of thy soul is what is to be understood here. It is not so difficult a question that it needs to be torn apart and massacred at every given movement of the entity.” Now this was in return to your asking for the challenge. “Do you come from God? What is your purpose?” And here you get scolded. “It is not so difficult a question that it needs to be torn apart and massacred at every given movement of entity.” That is not true. Understanding that all who come through you come from God are your friends will be with you always.

Bad and good come from God. Why are they scolding you? If it is a positive contact, it should thank you for challenging because it also is aware of the difficulties of getting a good, clear contact from the other end. And how sad they must feel when people aren’t tuned and haven’t challenged and keep answering questions that that channel gives. You move away from philosophy little by little. Think how bad that contact must feel as it has to move away. It has to simply say, “Okay, have a good time with this other person who is calling himself my name because he is going to end up feeding your false information and making you feel like a heel or chump because nobody will believe you anymore.” That is the trouble with bad contacts, with mixed contacts.

That wasn’t very mixed. It was just a hint, but I am real sensitive to them and yet in the same channeling, I have marked as good on page 3, “The children of thy offspring, the children that share the household, are joy in their nature no matter what the friction between the husband and wife. The lesson is touched with the truth of thine own heart, with thine own soul.” Good advice, philosophical advice, effective advice. Almost difficult to follow, but that is not the problem of the channel. The problem of carrying it out is left to the seeker so that was good advice and it was advice to yourself. If you can be objective about channeling to yourself, there is nothing wrong with your state of trance.

This is still mixed contact here. “There are those around you in great numbers who come into thy being at the drop of a hat. There are great numbers. They are mixed.” Yes, this was a particularly rich channeling. I marked it as your best thus far, 6-22.

Now we come to JF channeling Mafu. I do not like this man’s channel’s energy. He may be a lovely man, but the Yahweh, Jehovah, all of those things, and I felt like you were slumming because it is a combative spirit. “Their struggle has been our struggle etc.” It does say lots of other things too. It is positive and wants to be totally positive, but there is always a heavy undertone with that Jehovah type channel and also exclusivity, a tendency towards exclusivity. It doesn’t show up much in this channeling at all. It sounds like a wonderful experience, but I would rather hear you channel other than Yahweh any day.

“Beholding,” I have circled. Beholding is a word. “Allowness” is awkward too. You can say, “Our allowing is our beholding, is our ability to be alive on these earth planes.” I mean it could be said in actual English. Basically all you need to tell your contact is that you do not need the proof of these unusual word formations in order to trust and allow. And that you would appreciate a clearer, more beautiful, more graceful English given and that suggestion I think will probably do it.

You channeled about the 14th day of August something about joining of energies, friends coming together. I don’t know if anybody has talked to you about this before or not, but it is kind of interesting. We have gotten information from four or five different people in groups about the Harmonic Convergence, which the Mayan calendar has happening on August 16th and 17th and the Hopi calendar has happening on August 15th. The Mayan calendar ends something like 2012 and supposedly this August 16th and 17th is the time when at Paris spots, people will be joining to align the forces of nature and the forces of man into much greater harmony, and all over people will be rededicating themselves to the harmony of mankind and to the harmony of man with nature.

We are going to have a Harmonic Convergence picnic. I don’t know if this information is valid, but shoot, why not have a picnic anyway?

This is the last one. I am done, R. I might say in the interest of your archives, you might get your typewriter fixed because that missing “r” must make you go back and spend a tremendous amount of time cleaning up your typing. I hope you do keep an archive. The production of a book would be impossible without having good clear transcripts of everything you channel. One way you might do it, is say over the next three years, your channeling might really blossom in that time and that is not that long of a time either. Write down things that happened in your childhood, teenage hood, etc. that led you more and more into a knowledge of the you that you express in these channeling. The you that perceives the universe in spiritual terms. Then you might find it convenient to keep a diary, a short diary, each day, but just of the things that happen. If they really meant a lot to you in a spiritual way, write down what happened as if you were writing a letter to yourself.

For the production of a book, these things are very helpful. Also write down any dream that seems to be a clear dream that seems to have a bearing on your development at the moment.

Since I am done with you, I will talk about myself till the tape runs out. All is well here. I exist in a curious dichotomy of mind, which I am hoping I will outlast soon. The part of me that is suffering over Don is not suffering nearly as much, but the pain goes on and it is an every day affair because I haven’t forgiven myself yet for all of the things I wanted to do and couldn’t, and all of the things that I did that I couldn’t help. When Don was sick, it was a profound dislocation of myself to myself because it was the first thing in my life that I had not been in control of emotionally and mentally. It was the first time that life got so far beyond me that I could not but err. It was impossible to avoid making mistakes because I would get catatonic and be unable to do something. I would get hysterical and be unable to address the subject. You know, it was like that, and I still haven’t forgiven myself totally.

I don’t think there is anything psychic about it. Don isn’t coming back and haunting me or anything like that. I just haven’t forgiven myself totally and I work on that and pray over it every day. And I must get on with things. I must forgive myself. It is really time. But meanwhile, I haven’t yet and so the suffering continues and I just really believe that one day it is just going to come to me that I have forgiven myself and that I am really only living on one level and I really rejoice against that day’s occurring.

The other part of my mind is very, almost blissfully, happy most of the time. Jim and I do not fight like other people whom I know. We don’t seem to have, in the years of living together; we have not had serious differences because we are both pretty well motivated by the same things. A desire to be a straight arrow, and fair with everybody, and do good to everybody, and a need to be honest and some need for solitude. It is just a good matching of personalities although I am much more sociable than Jim is. I am still somewhat of a hermit so things are going really well here.

I am halfway on vacation because I don’t have a project at the moment. But my time has been filled. I’ve had three books sent me in the last two weeks in manuscript form to work on, and criticize and makes your stuff look short. So it is unlikely that I will lack for things to do and once the book comes out on channeling, which I think finally will happen in the next two months because we just got the title pages stuff in the mail asking is that the way we want it. So I know they are working on it.

It will take some time to print it up, and produce it and send it to us, but we have got 500 orders for the thing already and I have this feeling that my free time is going to go away real fast after that book comes out because I know there are lots of people who really need advice on channeling and are channeling. Also I do teach channeling. We have always done it in our home and have never charged for it, and we won’t plan to in the future, but we can only take four students at a time. I think one week in a month of having four people in the house is quite enough.

So as you can see, four times twelve, is only forty-eight people that we could work with in any given year. I look forward to being used more and more in my teaching capacity. We don’t actually teach people anything except the mechanics of channeling, which actually are very easy. You just simply start channeling. You simply start writing down what is coming through you and not worrying that it is coming from the depths of your own mind, if it feels like you are making it up. You don’t have to worry about that. You just have to keep channeling long enough to get deeper, and deeper, and deeper in your own mind and finally attach it to that great Mind. Get more and more impersonal in your source. I don’t think there really is such a thing as channeling outside of the self because the universe is entirely within the self. Thus even if you are channeling something like Ra, which is just incredibly impersonal, I have no problem if someone says to me, “I think you were just making it up.”

Fine. I was because Ra is a part of me. He has been objectified by a whole bunch of people worshipping him and all that kind of stuff, but I don’t really care if he came here in space ships and built the great pyramid, or whether he is a part of myself who wants to give some good advice on how to be working on your development. The information is all that needs to be judged. I never fuss with people who question the origin of this stuff. I just tell them, “Judge the material. Get out of my face.”

Jim is building a gazebo in the backyard, a meditation gazebo of stone. It looks like a shepherd’s cot high up in the mountains. It is really romantic looking and he is going to put a roof on it with trellises up to the roof on three sides. It is an eight-sided structure so that rambling roses can climb on the stones and up the sides and up on the roof. It is going to be beautiful, just overlooking the meditation garden, which is our whole backyard. He has made a bigger garden every year. And that is what he is doing now, out there doing stone work in the hot sun. I think I will go out and do a little sunbathing and hang out with him.

God bless, R. I am sorry for what you and L are going through in your personal lives. I hope that you don’t get too heavily into the service of channeling until you really are at peace. If you find there is a period of conflict, if you find that you will get apart, that you and your husband are going to be apart, if you get unsettled, pull in your reins and realize that you are tremendously vulnerable to psychic greeting at that time. And if you open yourself to channel, you are also, unless you are very careful, opening yourself to psychic greeting from the other side, and it is the well of opposition and we should be grateful to them. They help us out tremendously.

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