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Carla’s Niche

Carla’s Letter Tapes

CAVEAT: Warning! These letters have not been edited by Carla. Expect errors.

Letter to S

July 26, 1989

(This tape is quite muffled so has more “inaudibles” than usual.)

It’s early—about 8:35 and I’ll start this before I go to help set up for dance class. I’ve gotten my lessons free just for punching people’s tickets and writing their names down, which is a pretty good deal. I only have to do it three times a week now because she’s cancelled the evening classes, but I can go as many times as I want so I’ve been going to six a week of Jazzercise and of course, it isn’t ballet—it isn’t real thoughtful dancing, it’s an exercise program but I can make it into a dance. As you well know, you can dance your way through anything, or walk your way through anything and the thing I admire about you is you dance through life, you walk.

I want to talk to you about this snake and lion, because I don’t think you’re a bit nuts—I think you are a genuine, authentic mystic. I think you lead a mystical life. I think you think in the abstract perhaps even more than you think in the practical, which may perhaps make it difficult for you to communicate with Jim, unless he really stretches himself because he doesn’t think anything like that and his thoughts are very disciplined and scientific and he has a tremendous amount of mysticism and self-worth which he has apparently crammed down into some closet that he is afraid to open. And so, of course, he’s living the life of a person who is interested in this particular illusion.

Now, I would interpret boldly, very boldly, because I don’t know a thing about it—intuitively I would interpret that at the age of 6 your choice of a way to go was either wisdom or power within this incarnation, because the lion is the King of the Jungle—the lion is powerful—the lion is also your sign, I think (aren’t you a Leo?). Now the snake—no, it’s not a bad symbol at all. It’s a symbol of the rising Kundalini, it’s the symbol of arcane wisdom, it is the symbol of metaphysical truth. It is the symbol, among other things, of knowledge of true good and evil, or positive and negative.

You have chosen the path less traveled and that has made all the difference. I did too. I did not chose the lion. I did not chose worldly ambition, and faced with the opportunity of marrying a rich man so that I could have children and be comfortable, I repeatedly turned it down, two or three times (I haven’t known that many rich men). I turned down a lot because I am a genuine mystic and I value that about myself more than any one thing other than that because I think it’s probably the leading virtue as well as the leading fault or character defect—you know there’s always a downside to everything—the fact is I’m very spacey, I don’t know where I am, I lose my purse, I lose my sweaters, I drive people crazy because I’m not on time.

But I am seeking after wisdom and I have been very stable and persistent and so have you.

So, Jim DeWitt, before you knew him, was just as dedicated as you are, and more. More dedicated than I have seen anybody. He would go into the photographic room, where you can turn on the red light and develop photographs, and sit in the utter complete windowless darkness for hours at a time. His skin was translucent and clear because he was never out in the sun at all—he was just meditating, going to school, hanging out with me, and meditating and going to school.

He talked me into marrying him because he didn’t feel that he should go on the road and not be married—he was still Baptist at that point. He said at one point that he was sorry he was so close to me because he couldn’t have me any more—”you won’t listen to me any more”—which, of course, was not true. But it was a measure of Jim’s fear, I would say, of deep communication—deep, clear communication.

Now, I overrode that fear with my (inaudible)—I simply logically talked to him as a Jewish mother, and I just wouldn’t let him be—I just wouldn’t let him be. If he wouldn’t talk to me I’d do something—I’d break an egg over his head or something—he had to talk to me.

You’re not at all that way—you’re a lady. But my relationship with Jim—he kept leaving me. It was a much harder relationship in some ways than yours because it was more emotional because of the fact that I pressed him always to tell the truth about what he was actually feeling. He was aware of his pain, he didn’t (inaudible) you see, he couldn’t go get a job and numb out because I was living a very real life and he was living a part of it—and when he had angst and (inaudible) and all that kind of thing, I had to know what was going on.

What was going on was he hated marriage, he didn’t want a 9 to 5, blah blah.

You’re not like that. You’re a lady and you let Jim be and letting Jim be is dangerous because he’s got a machine that runs him—he does not run the machine (that is his head). In his own way he’s in full control of his mind, but in a metaphysical sense, he’s lost it because of the choices he’s made, and that brings us to the snake story.

However, I would like to comment on his service to you. Don always felt that Jim’s service to us was that he was acting as a service to self entity whom both you and I had the challenge of loving without any expectation in return—to put it baldly. I’m not sure that Jim has ever really loved. I have felt cherished by him and I’m sure you do too, but I have also felt very very rejected in many different ways.

I have no particular feeling about that—we do what we have to do. But I think that Elkins felt—and this is honest, this is serious, he said this without a grin or any indication it was a joke—and he said it several times during his life—that Jim’s purpose in this incarnation was to tempt you and to tempt me off of the spiritual path by coming on to us as a spiritual being and being just exactly the kind of guy that we wanted to work on a metaphysical conscious life with and then as soon as he marries, switching polarities completely and it’s all service to self—get more money, get more possessions, store up treasures on earth, and knock everything and be suspicious of everything.

He will have a hard time and I feel really sorry for him because the way he looks now is that (inaudible) trust there and so he’s always completely alone, he doesn’t have heart brothers or heart sisters that he can (inaudible) with the sole exception of J and I think that’s really sad because you are very capable of being a nurturing person but he is simply unable to take advantage of the qualities in your nature because you don’t push the line—you’re not a Jewish mother like I am and concerned enough to interrupt his free will—you’re much more fastidious.

That’s why I called you a lady—I’m too compulsively honest to be a true lady—I was raised as one but it didn’t really take. I get real and it does startle people sometimes. But I really do want to know what’s going on with people and I insist that people tell me what’s going on and that is not always ladylike.

Okay, I’ll get back to the lion and the snake. But I do need to comment on Jim’s donation to your life. He has donated to your life a resistance against which you have been pushing to stay pure in your seeking and single minded and single hearted in your love of the one infinite Creator.

Jim has a specialty—it’s a specialty I have no skill with—it is the gray area. The gray area of human social economical ethics—it’s the kind of gray area that’s got Poindexter, who’s just doing exactly what he thought he should do, in prison, or Oliver North, just following orders, and you can see the results of the moral, ethical breakdown of the old values in our society in scandal after scandal after scandal and it’s not just the United States’ fault—it’s everybody’s fault.

It’s basically the greed of the money people everywhere—I guess “international bankers” is kind of a cliché word, but they are concentrating the power of money and the power of power itself—the clout—of being in a certain position at a certain time, and so when you’re going to move to Florida, I think the lion symbol showed up again, because you again have the chance to choose. It was a whole new life—nobody knew you there in Florida—and you could become a happy little housewife and change to a cynical somewhat sarcastic smartass like Dewitt and go through life going for the gusto and having fun as much as you could, although Dewitt doesn’t seem to have a whole lot of fun (laughs).

He’s like—who is it in Shakespeare that plans and plans and schemes and schemes, is it Cassias in Julius Caesar, I don’t know, anyway, he’s a schemer. He really is. He’s always projecting into the future which is relatively wasteful because you can’t project very far into the future.

Now this New Age music—I usually don’t like New Age music—it sounds like this is a much-improved tape over the diddly squat meanderings of an indifferent pianist or flautist or whatever, that I hear usually, there’s just not much too it and it drives me crazy because the person is simply not skilled enough to get the mystical nuances out of the instrument that I would wish.

I’ve just been spoiled—I’ve listened to too much classical music and the mystical emotions especially in sacred music are so powerful that diddling around with some dumb instrument—unless it shows a high level of skill I have a problem with because of being prejudiced as a musician.

You are an authentic mystic and you will from time to time need to go within and focus on something that you don’t understand, but that you have blind faith in—that’s what a mystic is all about, is that when you feel that something is needed and when you feel that something is good for you you’ll simply go ahead and do it. You don’t have to have a reason, it doesn’t have to be rational, you don’t have to justify it, you simply say “I feel this is what I want to do”.

Jim doesn’t know about that. (Laughs) He’s put off all of his feelings, I think, until after the kids are grown, because he is, I’m giving him that, very responsible about the kids, and God bless what will happen when the last one leaves home because then he’ll start thinking about himself and what he wants to do and he’s got a real strange self image, which may make him make really weird decisions, but at any rate—back to the snakes.

So you saw two snakes. First Jim just saw one, then (inaudible) and you saw the other equally large black snake—a he and she combo, okay. When Jim came out he had that (inaudible) revolver, and he shot his snake—his wisdom—shot it dead. He is rejecting the role of wisdom and compassion—he is opting for the cold gray area of human ethical concerns. For some reason it’s a challenge he needs to take up in this incarnation—he does not feel the desire to be restful and peaceful and faithful and abiding and any of those things which come from the joy and peaceful things of the one infinite Creator.

And I feel very badly for that. If he doesn’t go to church, you know he should have some sort of spiritual practice to have a home, because kids need to know there is a Creator in the universe that created them out of love and that there is a relationship they have with the Creator that gives them eternal life, eternal love, more and more wisdom and refinement, and the ability to help others, and this is very important to children.

It doesn’t matter if you use the Jesus myth, or if you make up your own myth, or you talk to the brothers and sisters of the Confederation of Planets in Service to the One Infinite Creator. The ability to imagine, the ability to ideal, the ability to think about spiritual symbols is just as important to a young child as it is to an adult—maybe more important, because as an adult you can just go completely off the deep end and join something like the Seventh Day Adventist and never be seen again.

So you see what Jim did—he killed his snake—he killed his wisdom—he chose again to be the Lion. He is going after the gusto; he chose again to be the lion. He is going after the gusto—the lion is the king of the jungle—he represents power over the jungle—power over the shadow of death—power over this illusion. And Jim is powerful within the illusion, he’s making his own way, he’s making his own decisions, he makes really good money, and so forth and so on.

You have your snake. Now I don’t see physical death in here—I see your dream about the physical death, as your trying to work out your fears of somebody dying, (inaudible). Now I could be wrong, and if I am, please excuse me. I wouldn’t want to be without sympathy—if anybody died I think it would be Dewitt—which is no bad thing, because he hasn’t been happy for a long time and I don’t know when he will be.

But he killed the snake—what he’s best at in the world is spiritual speaking and spiritual singing—he’s wonderful at that, he has a good deal of wisdom, but he killed his wisdom—he doesn’t want to deal with it.

Now I do not feel in any sense of the word that you are going off your rocker—you are an authentic mystic. You should read Evelyn Underhill on Mystics—”Mysticism” is the name of the book and I would recommend it most highly to you. It is a wonderful book, it covers the territory and it gives you lots of stuff to read in the bibliography, but she does just a bang up job of defining mysticism, talking about mysticism, talking about different people’s contributions to mysticism, and so forth, and perhaps you could understand better about the fact that you are presently saying that you happen to be the kind of person who’s intuitive strengths are abnormally strong so that you have a resonance and a depth to your life which comes from deep intuition about things that many people, including Jim, sometimes deny.

That does not mean that I view you as crazy, it means you are unique (inaudible.

As to falling into some kind of self-induced maze—we all are biased in many many ways. Consequently, we are all to some extent in some kind of self-induced maze. What we have to watch out for that the maze is not created out of fear, but out of real seeking, real curiosity, real trying things out, and no attachment to the outcome. If fear is in the picture anywhere then your spiritual practice goes down the drain.

So you did not fear the snake—you simply chose to remain with wisdom and to reject the power of the world, the power of riches and wealth and so forth and so on.

So my interpretation of the snake—the two snakes—I want to reiterate it—is simply that Dewitt will not allow wisdom in his life, he wants to be self-powerful and although he’s a very kind hearted person he’s really moving in service to self in ways that I don’t think he would approve of if he had an undistorted view but nobody has an undistorted view and I think for him to be truly content and happy, I think he would have to go back to being more of a groover and less of a worker and so, I don’t know what the story is on that one.

If I could think of any good advice to give you I would, but when you all were here and I took a look at him, I realized that he had changed so much in his attitudes of thinking, he’d been so toughened by life that—he’s the same person inside but you have to dig deep to find it. He shot his snake—your snake is fine. You have decided to live a life in wisdom which means that you will constantly be moving against public opinion, you will constantly be having hassles from people who are your bosses who don’t understand why you’re doing your students in such and such a way, of course it’s to be of service to them. You’re being of service to Jim with no expectation of any return because he seems to be incapable of accepting you just the way you are and that doesn’t make for a very good loverly relationship, although I experienced him 25 years ago as an excellent lover—I’m not sure that he values it as much as he used to as far as quality—and maybe he’s looking for quantity, I don’t know.

Anyway, it isn’t your problem. I honestly don’t believe it is. I believe that the snake is your symbol of the rising Kundalini—that you have continued to follow the path of wisdom and that that is the appropriate path for you to choose in light of your decision to come here.

I loved the story about the tape—I can really see how something like that would just tickle the dickens out of you because that’s very deep material in the age regressions and I experienced a lot from it too—a lot of resonances, feelings that it was truly a legitimate age regression.

And of course when Morris was regressed—it was a 70 pager, I typed it out myself—that was back when I was still working. Morris identified in an engineering or mechanically descriptive way, a lot of the things that you and B were trying to describe with our liberal arts training. Morris was giving details: “The light wasn’t casting a shadow so I don’t know where the source is…” and it all fit together, so there isn’t much doubt in my mind that we are who we think we are—we’re on this planet to serve and I don’t know what the future holds for you but it may be that at some point you will want to join L/L Research, and of course, you’re welcome.

I would guess after the kids are grown and I doubt that DeWitt would come, but he really isn’t treating you very well. I’m sure he’s doing the best he can—I really feel for him, he’s got a lot going for him. He’s as smart as a whip and he can really get the job done—anything he puts his mind to. But he tells me he can’t talk to you. Now, I can talk to him, and I can talk to you. I don’t have any trouble with you—I don’t have any trouble with him. I don’t understand what his problem is. He says he doesn’t want to talk philosophy. Why not? I don’t really understand why he’s gotten rigid and kind of boxed in by his own decisions. I don’t understand why someone would resist instead of flow with what was happening with the two of you. The potential for really happy times was right there—you were really in love when you got married. I don’t know—maybe it was something about having the kids that freaked him out. He just seems to have been freaked out ever since.

I will, to my death, believe that Jim is a basically wonderful and very sweet guy. I have always valued his ability to make me laugh, which is something that you’ve commented on many times too, but the politeness without clear communication that I’m gathering Jim has with you—he’s polite and he’s behaving, and you’re polite and you’re behaving, but there isn’t really solid communication happening. I think that’s a tragedy, because Jim’s the one who has a big intellect. Jim’s the one that can find new and creative ways, easily, to communicate in depth with you, and the fact that he chooses not to—that is a measure of how afraid he is that he will be trapped by his mystical self—the snake. He has set his mind upon being powerful in this illusion and he’s making money, providing for the kids, he’s got that in his mind that that’s what he wants to do and if he shows any wisdom of a mystical nature whatsoever, it will ruin him because he won’t be able to do his work.

I’ve gathered this over—he’s called me from time to time for years—I guess since about three years ago when you and he were having some difficulty—and that’s what I gathered from him. I believe I understand the situation and I look at it and I can only say it takes a very strong woman to continue this relationship, but I agree with you that Jim has a great deal to teach.

I think I’d just let him be, being you, because it would be much too difficult for you to try to communicate with him if he isn’t willing. With me, you see, I was a truly Jewish Mama type of person—I got (inaudible)—he talked to me. If he didn’t talk to me easily, he talked to me after I broke an egg over his head or poured some water on him. I got his attention and we talked.

And consequently, we got divorced. Because I found that as much as he loved me, he hated marriage a lot. Now, he hasn’t said anything much to me about yeah or nay—he’s just talking about justice and fair plans and ethics and honesty, you know the kind of thing where you have yourself and you don’t have a God so you have to control yourself and have your own ethics. It’s a very sterile concept compared to the mystical reality that all things are holy, all things are of the creator, he knows this—I just don’t understand this about Jim

But that he has been a key person for both of us is undoubtedly true, and Don was the one who said several times that he thought that Jim was put here on this earth to tempt you and me off of the spiritual path that we were on, which is an amazing statement to make and perhaps biased and prejudicial on Don’s part, but he was usually right—as a matter of fact I never knew him to be wrong, and that’s a fact. He was probably right about Jim.

Now what Jim’s karma is in all of this, what Jim’s lessons in love are, I suppose are just buckling down and providing for a family which he very much dislikes doing and yet something he’s totally bent on, so whatever bliss he’s getting he’s from that work and from the workouts of making his body better and all that stuff, and I understand the body building very easily, because I have never known anyone as self-conscious as Jim so he would be absolutely thrilled to look his very best. I do think he ought to let his hair go grey and grow a beard because I think that would suit him better.

But his view of himself is as it will be and if he wants to look like his Dad, then okay. I think a beard would probably be better.

As always, Sallie, if there is a difficulty and you really need to get away for the weekend, since both of you are working I gathered that money is plentiful enough that you could perhaps purchase an airplane ticket without breaking the bank—just come up here and rest. You know, sometime during the summer. I’ve got K coming in September, she’s going to be living with us. I’ve got a friend, I don’t know if you remember S, she started meditations about the same time R and S did, and S is a really sweet girl and she has been living with an alcoholic and you and I both know how it is to live with an alcoholic—so finally she’s gotten around where she’s ready to leave the relationship.

Although, being service to others oriented she feels guilty that she can’t help—but you can’t help a drunk. You can love them, but you can’t help them. It’s an addiction—it’s a disease. You’re not dealing with a person, you’re dealing with a disease. The pathology—believe me I know of what I speak because of having an alcoholic mother and she’s been sober for 13 years and she’s still crazy.

Moving on to more joyful subjects—and remember, that is a blanket invitation, just give us a call so we’ll know to pick you up.

(Carla continues speaking about her physical state, medicines she taking, and coming to peace with her limitations. She also talks about shoes she’s had special made to fit the bones in her feet—she also talks about what a wonderful birthday she had.)

The situation with the new book “Channelings from the Holy Spirit—A Book of Days”, is really up in the air. We needed to get subscriptions worth $10,000 altogether in order to pay for the first thousand books, and we got under a thousand dollars—not even one-tenth in orders up front. I think it’s the kind of thing that would sell once out, because it’s one of those thought for the day kind of things and those are always helpful in people’s morning offerings and whatever they do in their seeking and meditations, and I’ve come to feel that they must be okay because Jim’s really crazy about them and he’s got them all typeset and ready to go, but we don’t have the $10,000 to print it.

Now a publishing company, called Transition Publishing, has been trading letters with Jim but much to Jim’s frustration the letters he gets back never answer any of the questions that Jim asks. He wants to know how much they would charge per book, he wants to know what his benefit would be signing with them. He wants to know how much they’ll charge per book, he wants to know what his benefit would be by signing with them because he hasn’t signed (inaudible) because Don just signed the contract to them and I believe it takes Jim’s signature as well as President of L/L to make that legal.

At any rate, they wrote that they wanted to do the whole Law of One series and Jim explained very clearly and succinctly to them that we have had a disastrous experience with the Donning Company and we would have to know how they were going to promote, how they were going to distribute, what kind of inventory they were going to keep up because Donning never printed anything unless we ordered and that meant that for most of the time we would be out of books and couldn’t distribute to our people which was stupid of them.

So anyway, I don’t know where that’s going to go because Jim has been communicating very very clearly and the guy from these Schiffer people, the ones that Donning apparently sold the contract to, are just not communicating yet.

This Transition Publishing company is also low on funds but they would like to publish the books and once again this may be the only way we can get the books published is to let somebody else pay for the printing. All we can hope is that if they do that they will give us a better deal than we got with the Donning Company for the Ra Material, because The Ra Material—Book 1 of the Law of One is the most expensive item we have to offer in the mail due to the fact that we have to pay the normal wholesale price, not from the printer, but from the publisher, whereas if we just pay the printer, it’s cheaper than that because nobody has to make a profit before you get to it.

So all of this stuff is up in the air—it will happen sometime—eventually $10,000 will come into our coffers if we just wait long enough or this publishing thing may work out.

I haven’t even sent it out to anybody—they wrote us when they read the thing in Light Lines and said they wanted to publish the book. I imagine their heart’s in the right place….

(Carla speaks about the “Bach Society”, church activities and other personal matters having to do with friends and acquaintances.)

… we do a downtown ministry to the homeless that’s pretty impressive—Jim grows a whole garden full of stuff for them every summer and lots of other people bring in fresh fruit and I imagine everybody in the parish gives something so staples can be purchased…

(Carla speaks about her physical health and medications she is taking.)

I think that I will be feeling better about myself after Kim comes and Jim isn’t so hassled.

Kim and Jim both have this instinctive ease about taking care of me which feels to me as if it were prearranged, because it’s very unusual for a woman or a man to treat a grown woman like a five-year-old, but both Kim and Jim do it without any loss of cheerfulness, or any difficulties having to do with the fact that I’m taking up their time, neither one of them thinks of it that way at all, they both value me a lot more than I’m valuing myself right now, I think, and figuring “This is the goose that lays the golden egg, so we really want to take care of her.” And meanwhile, I’m asking myself “Well, the Ra Material is done and it’s probably the best thing I’ll ever do so why am I sticking around and taking up room on the planet, and making all these people have to help me out”…

It’s very difficult for someone who has as much of a work ethic as I do. I will to be productive and the evidence of that is the stuff I’ve done since I’ve become disabled, because that’s all been done on either channeling or tape. I haven’t written anything or typed anything for a long long time.

The Channeling Handbook was done on tape and transcribed, and it may be a good thing that I work that way now because when I’m working on tape, my prose is not as crystallized and stylized as when I’m working on the typewriter. When I’m working on tape it’s a talking media and I simply converse, whereas when I’m writing, I’m looking for ways to more esthetically say the same thing; the best esthetic arrangement of words in the sentence, the proper nuances, all that, and yes, I can write like a bandit—I’ve won prizes all my life for creative writing, just like you. (I don’t know if you’ve won any prizes, but you have a great talent).

I find it utterly useless (laughs)—I’m not interested in the halls of academia or becoming rich and famous—or a pundit on whatever. I basically just like staying at home—I never minded working, but I like this work the best of any I’ve ever done. I miss being with the kids as a librarian. As far as the feeling of helping, I have more of the feeling that I’m helping here than I did before because people are writing to me from all over the world and even in my somewhat diminished condition having to lie back on a cushion all the time—I can do that work and I can also channel and I feel I’m blessed because of that.

So that’s the news from here—I do not think you are in any way crazy. I think we all have our peculiarities and quirks and idiosyncrasies, but I don’t think that should be taken to mean that each of us is a little crazy. I’ve seen crazy and Sal—you are not crazy. You make perfect sense—all you’re doing is you have a private myth—you see, you are working on your spiritual life without access to a completely Christian faith because the Baptist Church burned you too badly (I’m just assuming that—since you don’t go to church, with all the judgment and guilt and all of that).

I see the function of religion as myth. I see my own mystic Christianity as the Christ myth leading me to God. My mysticism is total. I don’t care if Jesus ever lived. I like the story—it’s my myth, I’ve made it my own, I’m walking that path, I found a parish that I can (inaudible) and I think it’s really helping me.

But what you are doing is just creating your own myth with your own symbols that you draw from within your own inspirational self and you need to respect that private myth. You need to respect those things that make you feel holy, or sanctified, or blessed, you need the experience of adoration of the Creator and praise and thanksgiving and a lot of those things are wonderful wonderful emotions that are spiritually based emotions and you’re having to work without the net, that this, not belonging to an organized religion, where there are things to do to exercise your will, like giving up something for Lent or whatever. One is constantly thinking about God if one is working the Christian path because you read the bible every day and so on and so forth.

But I strongly suggest that you not only keep on with this symbology but that you record it, look at it, and mythologize—find further resonances for you, find what goes deep—what means something, what creates faith in you, what moves your will.

Don’t ever apologize for being a mystic. That is the direction of human evolution. We’ve done about all we can with our bodies. Evolution from now on is consciousness and that’s where you’re working and it’s where I’m working, it’s where we both want to be. It’s more important to the planet than any other single service that you can perform. In addition, you are performing the most martyred of all services, that is, motherhood, parenthood, and doing it with a good deal of grace (inaudible) and also giving of yourself into the school environment so you are really serving right now, but you need feeding. You need spiritual food, so do whatever it is that feeds you, and don’t apologize and just be yourself because you are not crazy—as a matter of fact, you are one of the sanest people I know.

You are very steady, nice, gentle, strong entity, and I put the emphasis on strength because I’ve seen your strength, your determination, your grip. You’ve really got it but what you need now is simply to believe in yourself that you find that faith that abides, the faith that what is happening right now is what is supposed to be happening—that there is love in this moment and just moment by moment let your faith carry you and turn your will towards the one infinite Creator. I think it would help the kids too, to observe that you have a daily spiritual exercise, meditation, or, you don’t have to make a point of it but I think kids learn more from imitation than what their parents say. And if they see you giving homage to the Creator, they may not choose the path that you have chosen, but at least know that there are some options that they may want to explore.

I think that’s about it.

(Speaks of more personal things with laughter and good humor.)

I will talk to you next time. Send me a letter when you’ve got the inspiration and time. I just wish that I could hug you and let you know that you’re okay and that I’m absolutely positive that you’re okay and I support you in every way and you’re just in my heart all the time. Just feel that and don’t feel alone and you’ll get through this thing.

I’m afraid the path of wisdom is sometimes very bleak, but you’re doing a good job of it. And the compassion that you show has grown through the years, I think, in spite of, in fact perhaps because of Jim’s existence, so everybody has a place in this world even if it’s as a bad example, right? (Laughs).

God bless and I will talk to you later, Bye by.

Carla.

  Skip Navigation LinksL/L Research Carla’s Niche Letter Tapes July 26, 1989

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