[This session was preceded by a period of tuning and meditation.]
R & C
How do we know what it is that we need to be doing with our lives and energies in the spiritual senses, and how can we accomplish what it is we are to do? In our hearts we know that we are spirit, but we want to know how the everyday self that lives the life knows what to work on and how to do it.
How do the three lower chakras, which are clear and balanced like Jesus’ were, show or demonstrate themselves in this third density?
Barbara
I am aware that no matter how clearly I offer to give my energy, my ego creeps in, and I become afraid that I can’t trust what I am doing because I know there is distortion. How do we work with that—the distortion that humans create?
K
While becoming aware of fearing a meeting with another, I opened my heart to that person without any defenses; and then I felt the knot of fear dissolve and energy moved up to my heart. Is there any principle of working with the lower energy centers that this exercise took advantage of? What are the most effective ways of working with the lower chakras that will allow us to open the heart chakra? How would the same experience look from each energy center’s point of view?
Jim
How do we maintain our passion for pursuing the spiritual journey after many years of seeing that things seem to happen as they will, and perhaps the most that we can do is keep a good attitude for all changes that come our way?
[The foregoing questions and comments will be used as seed for continuing on with the topic of how to open the heart chakra that the two previous sessions have begun.]
Aaron
I am Aaron. I rejoice once again to be with you. As we continue these sessions, your energy level grows higher and there is great joy and aspiration in your vibrations. All of the questions that you are asking come together. While I will not speak at length here of this honest question of spiritual vocation, I do want to begin by stating a common misunderstanding and offering clarification.
When you consider the blockages of the lower chakras, what comes to your minds are the heavy emotions, the desires for power or control, anger or greed or jealousy. You wonder how you may clarify those energies in yourselves. The common distortion among earnest seekers is that you must get rid of all of those desires and fears in order for the heart to open and in order for the lower chakras to be clear. But that very desire to be rid of this or that in your experience backfires. This is what closes the chakras.
It is not the arising of fear and its attendant emotions of anger or greed or need to control that close the chakras, but your moving in one direction or the other from that first sensation of fear: either into action upon those desires or angers, or into need to get rid of them. Both are distortions. The arising of emotion in the human is not a distortion. It is not the fear nor the anger nor greed that keeps you returning to third-density experience, but your relationship with those emotions.
You are all spiritually sophisticated. Think of what you know of fourth-density experience, what you have been told of it. This is group energy experience where all beings are fully telepathic with one another. Everything is shared. The learning is so rapid because you have no need to hide your experiences from another nor to defend yourself from another’s experience. There is total openness to whatever is expressed, with no judgment about it.
Where you each are presently, when there is heavy emotion you feel some shame about that. So there is some unwillingness to share that with another. When you hear of another’s heavy emotion, there is some discomfort with it rather than equanimity. But it is total equanimity with emotion that denotes readiness for fourth-density experience.
You are not here in human incarnation to cease experiencing physical sensations or emotions. You understand that for the physical body. You know that if you stub your toe, it is going to hurt. When there is such pain, you do not try to deny the pain. You do not feel it is bad that there is pain. There is just pain. You may dislike the pain, but you do not judge it. There is simply aversion to it because it is uncomfortable. When you stub your emotional toe and there is anger or greed, you label it as “bad”: “I should get rid of this or that and then I will be pure.” The emotions that grow out of fear are uncomfortable. Part of your work is to learn to relate to those emotions with the same openheartedness with which you relate to that stubbed toe, without judgment of the self that is experiencing them and consequently without judgment to the other selves that are experiencing such emotions.
This is the foundation for the work of all beings in third density. It is through the constant judgment of what you experience that self solidifies and enhances the illusion of separation. You are here to reconfirm that there is no separate self, that the self solidifies through dwelling in delusion. The more you fight with the presence of an emotion, the more self solidifies, the more sense there is, “I must get rid of this or that to purify myself.” What you have to do, then, is to change your relationship to that which arises in you.
This brings us back to the human living this life, feeling the closing lower chakras, feeling the arising of fear, anger, greed, prejudice, jealousy, whatever the emotion may be. Increasingly, you allow the perspective which finds compassion for the human tossed into emotions by the continuing catalysts of the incarnation. You become less and less reactive, more able to keep the heart open.
This brings us to K’s experience whereby she found such compassion and connection with this other whom she was afraid to meet. When there is judgment against fear, it automatically enhances separation, which brings you back into the dialogue with fear that I spoke of earlier. Then there is a self feeling it should get rid of this and grasp at that. When you notice the arising of fear simply and with compassion to the human caught in that situation, self dissolves. There is no longer a doer. Then all these powerful energies I spoke of earlier, these beautiful seeds of loving-kindness, of patience, of generosity and ever so many more have the opportunity to flourish.
They are not seeds that can flourish in the self that grasps at them. No matter how much you attempt to be patient with a sense, “I should be patient,” you cannot make that blossom grow any more than you can make a rose open by willing it to open. The warm light of love shined on it, the warm sunshine, is what allows the rose to open, is what allows generosity, patience, loving-kindness, energy, truthfulness, to express themselves through you.
At this point the lower chakras are open, not because you have willed them to open by willing a riddance of the issues concerned therein, but by creating so much space that the issues simply fall away. You find the ability to smile at this being that wants to be in control—not to laugh at it, not to mock it in any way or to take its pain less than fully seriously, but to hold it in love.
This is the work for which you incarnated. We have spoken of this before. The lessons of compassion and wisdom are valuable, and there is no reason not to start on those lessons in third density; but you are here to learn love and faith. And if there is not a firm foundation of those lessons of love and faith, then lessons of the higher densities will become distorted.
What does it mean to love unconditionally? What does it mean to have faith? That is another seed within you. How can you allow that seed of faith to blossom? By the constant reminder: Everything within this human experience, all the physical sensations, all the emotions, are acceptable.
Obviously, that does not give you free rein to be reactive to those emotions and harm others. But the reaction to the emotion and the experiencing of the emotion itself are two vastly different things. You are here not to learn never to be angry, but to find compassion for the human when anger arises, to find space for all your humanness.
We are asked about the one known as Jesus. The question assumed that this one’s lower chakras were open, and asked, “How did that affect the upper chakras?” This one, of course, came into incarnation with the lower chakras entirely opened. And yet, even this one did experience human emotion. Even the Bible tells that at times he became angry. Certainly, he felt physical pain in his body and some aversion to that pain. The issue is not keeping the lower chakras open so that the heart center can open. The heart center may be opened while there is still some distortion in the lower chakras. The issue is, can one find such deep love for this human that one can see the distortion in the lower chakras without condemnation, fully embracing the human experience?
Jim has asked, how can one maintain a passion about this work? Perhaps one best facilitates the allowing of that passion to express itself by focusing on just this full embracing of the human. I would suggest that it is the judgment against the human that puts the damper on that sense of passion.
My dear ones, your earnest seeking and desire to express your energy with more and more purity, to do the work you came to do, so deeply moves those of us who have moved beyond the incarnative experience. Your work is a very real gift to us, as it deepens our compassion to watch you struggle and remember those struggles of our own. This is not only true of one such as myself that has moved through the earth plane, but is also true of those of Q’uo, of all beings that have moved through the different densities on whatever plane they have done so. This is your gift to us, and I thank you for it.
When you wonder what is your work here, what is it about, I ask only that you keep in your mind that the work you do is on so many different levels that you cannot begin to imagine the span of it. For now, you are human. Allow yourselves to be human. Work with the catalysts of this density. It is fine to acquaint yourselves with what comes next, both as inspiration for your work and to help you keep a balanced perspective. But you do not need to use this present incarnative experience doing the work that you will do in higher densities. Embrace this human experience and the human that you are. Cherish yourselves. If I could give just one piece of advice it would be that: Cherish yourselves.
A cry comes up from you, “Yes, Aaron, how? How do I cherish myself?” I will move on to that question in a while. I would like now to pass the microphone to Q’uo. That is all.
Q’uo
I am Q’uo. Greetings once again, my friends, in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We join the one known as Aaron in thanks for the beauty of your seeking and the plangent cry of your call. It is indeed that which inspires such as we, and offers us the optimal opportunity for our own service and further learning.
May we now ask a question of you? As you followed the meditation with which we closed the previous session, did each feel the transformation of vibration that went from the impulse of negative emotion to its uplifting in the most sacred of healings? We suggest that this was one example of the process by which a way is found to work with one distortion at a time and communicate, with the purest voice of openheartedness, with the suffering portions of the self.
We said earlier that communication was a great key. There are many ways to communicate with one’s distortions while within the distortion as an entity. They all partake in various ways of the use of those ways of communicating which go beyond words and intellectual considerations so that the spirit within the self may speak healing to the manifested self. If one attempts to bring into the heart chakra each felt distortion, one is violating the self, attempting to drag energy where it is not rising naturally. However, if one can see the heart as always open and allow the heart to be moved into communication with the lower chakra in the lower, then the combined vibrations, instead of the green muddied by forced portions of red, orange and yellow, remain crystalline—the green color shimmering upon the type of communication mentally or physically voiced. This, then, looks like a living stream of the most lovely light green, which shimmers and surrounds and gradually alleviates the blockage of red, orange or yellow so that the two colors gradually become equal in their radiance and power.
Prayer is one way of moving beyond words with words. If one can conceive of the prayer, “infinite Creator,” as the Father/Mother which truly listens and truly cares unstintingly, then one may be moved to share one’s confusions in the privacy of prayer. One may, for instance, as this instrument does, simply speak her heart: “Dear Creator, I am at sea. I feel frustrated. I do not know what to do. He hurt my feelings. I hurt.” There does not have to be a lofty, beautiful, aesthetically pleasing quality to the prayer. Speaking one’s truth when one is in pain is not likely to be pretty. It is obversely very likely to be the whine, the howl, the indignant, barbaric NO of the small, small child; for that which hurts is that which is not deeply understood.
The darkness is that of ignorance. Pain of incarnative quality, pain which blocks energy, is primitive pain no matter how sophisticated the source of that pain or the spiritual nature of its origin, which may be very far removed from basic, instinctual pain. So in prayer, communication is best when it is forthrightly honest, even and especially when that pain partakes of pettiness, foolishness, unjustified indignation and is full of errors in judgment. To howl your mistakes and the pain you feel is certainly to howl about that which is not so; for your pain, your self-judgment, all this is a dream within a dream, yet it is this exact dream which you wish to heal. Thusly, pray truth the best way you can.
There is a quality to other kinds of communication which, like prayer, use words to go beyond words: the reading aloud of those poems or passages of inspired writing which speak to one’s distress focus and purify the heart’s journey to the blockage below. Now each center is as the heart center, in truth, opening and functioning well; however, because the lower centers are concerning themselves with relationship there is no independence or spirit-driven movement available below the heart chakra. The green, blue and indigo rays, upon the other hand, are focused upon absolutes offered from the spirit within and do not depend upon any, shall we say, earthly relationship to be viable. Yet to spend all of the time in the higher energy centers with lower-chakra communication left undone is to invite the gradual attenuation of strength available for that work because of the unattended difficulties with relationships, the self to the self being chief among these.
At this point, the one known as Aaron may take the microphone, as we feel there is a natural shift at this point. We find this sharing of teaching most pleasant, and we thank each for allowing this combined use of these channels; for it is greatly heartening to both the one known as Aaron and us. We now transfer. We are those of Q’uo.
Aaron
I am Aaron. The relationship of the self to the self, how to learn to cherish this self so that one may fully cherish all selves—that is the gift of your incarnation. Can you begin to see, then, that the distortion that leads to not cherishing the self is part of the gift and not a barrier in the way of learning of this love? If there were not that arising of sensing the self as imperfect, of the arising of low self-esteem and all those many emotions that lead to less than treasuring of the self, with what would you practice? What if this self always appeared to be perfect? Somewhere on this journey of yours, you are bound to meet that which does not appear to be perfect. Without this practice, you would judge it and have strong aversion to it. All that which you judge within yourself is the gift for practicing non-judgment and unconditional love.
As humans, you work so strongly with habit and your habit says, “Judge! Get rid of!” You are so immersed in that pattern. First, you begin to see the pattern, to bring mindfulness to bear on the arising of judgment. What is this low self-esteem? You might ask yourself in a situation in which low self-esteem is present, “What if I really liked myself here despite whatever heavy emotions are arising in me? What if I really treasured myself?” When you ask that question, you may begin to see the ways that low self-esteem becomes an escape.
Unconditional love is very difficult. The human feels hurt and wants to fight back, feels betrayed and wants revenge. The human sometimes does not feel ready to be as responsible as some judgmental inner voice suggests that it should be. You have habitually used this pattern of moving into dislike of the self as an escape from the direct experience of the heavy emotions and the need to be responsible for them with kindness. It is uncomfortable not to like the self, but it perhaps is even more uncomfortable to recognize the true divinity of your nature and that you are capable of unconditional love. Here is the child pouting, “I want to get even!” The child wants to get in that one good kick. The child that is loved despite its pain and anger is far less likely to need to kick. When unworthiness arises, ask yourself, “If I were not feeling unworthiness, what might I be feeling?” What heavy emotions which are so terribly discomforting does the unworthiness mask? Can you see how much ego there is in unworthiness?
Look at the patterns that you have established. If what you see is a desire to be a bit irresponsible, that is okay, too. It does not mean that you need to act on that desire, just notice that it is there. “What if I can’t really carry this off? What if my emotions begin to control and pull me into reactivity?” That is another fear. So, you back off and say, “Well, I won’t even try.” And then you move into that dislike of the self.
Watch unworthiness arise. Watch the way it closes off the lower chakras and then seems to give you permission to react, because any other choice becomes seemingly impossible with the lower chakras closed. You thereby hand permission to the child self to express itself. Your work is not to deny the existence of this child self nor to allow it to have its tantrums, but to hear the child self and offer it love. It is this continued remembering to love the self, whatever is being experienced, that provides full healing of the sense of unworthiness.
In a very real way you are each born, each come into incarnation, with this that needs to be healed. You do not need to be perfect to offer that love to yourself, but to learn to forgive your imperfections. You see this message in the life and especially in the death of the one known as Jesus. He told those who died on crosses beside him essentially that he loved them. This is that message of the Divine who said, “This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.” That is a message offered not only to the one known as Jesus, but to all of you. You are loved, not because you are perfect, not because you are without heavy emotions, not because you express your energy with perfect purity but simply because you are. It is that healing to which you are invited to come.
How do you begin to forgive yourselves? You cannot learn to cherish yourself until you forgive yourself for being less than perfect in this human form. You are not cherishing the perfect, but the human.
There are many practices one might use. As Q’uo suggested, prayer is very powerful. Ask for help. When you feel yourself condemning yourself, give that to the Divine and ask for help with it. “Lord, this human is fallible. I have hurt others and myself, and now I’m filled with condemnation of myself for that hurting. Help me find forgiveness and compassion for this imperfect human that I am.”
Please notice that there is a difference between the sense of unworthiness itself and the relationship to it. When you experience unworthiness, you may then watch the arising of aversion to it and attend first to that aversion, asking yourself, “Can I just be present with the unworthiness and watch it? Can I be present with any emotions, voices, fears, memories within me which prompted the arising of unworthiness? Can I let the whole thing be and just watch it?” This gentleness brings in light and space. The heart opens. There may still be the remnants of the anger, jealousy or greed that prompted the unworthiness. There may still be an aversion to all of that, the unworthiness and the emotion, because they are uncomfortable. But they are attended to skillfully.
This is where Q’uo’s image of bringing the heart center into the lower chakras may be seen. There is no force here, just a willingness to be present with all of the confusion without judgment, letting it all float. Then the unworthiness does not solidify, a self does not solidify to combat the unworthiness. Instead there is a gentle love offered to the self that is experiencing so much pain, including unworthiness. It allows a shift in perspective to this angel aspect of the self which is perfect and which you know is worthy. Within that shift, you begin to find wholeness. There is nothing left that needs to be gotten rid of. Just letting it be, allowing it to be present or to dissolve at its own speed while it is offered love.
What you will find is that your increasing ability to offer love begins a new pattern, a far more skillful pattern whereby, as I suggested yesterday with the arising of fear, the arising of unworthiness becomes a catalyst, not for the offering of more disdain to the self but a catalyst for compassion. This reconnects the lower chakra centers to the heart center. It reconnects the spirit body to the physical and emotional bodies, and you come back into wholeness and into balance. It is here where even a sense of unworthiness becomes seen as a valuable gift for your learning, and you embrace it rather than wage a war with it.
I would like to close with a guided forgiveness meditation, which is another powerful tool in spiritual work. Before I do so, I would like to pass the microphone to Q’uo to see if my brother/sister has that which it would like to add; and then would ask briefly before the meditation that you simply stretch, as many of you are feeling tiredness in your body and I would like you to be able to sit for five or ten minutes to participate more fully in the meditation. That is all.
Q’uo
I am Q’uo, and am again with this instrument.
In communicating from the heart center to the suffering and unworthy self perceived by the self, the seeker is healing its own incarnation one small symptom at a time. The infection called life is incurable and mortal. The small infections called error or sin or distortion are not fatal, merely greatly uncomfortable. When attempting to function as a healer, then, the techniques of healing which are not mechanical or chemical involve necessarily the first healing, which is the healing of the instrument which the seeker is who wishes to heal.
The heart is the seat of intelligent healing energy brought down, first into the violet ray which contacts the Logos itself of intelligent Infinity, as this instrument would say, and then through the indigo ray of intelligent Energy. This indigo ray is that which is your work in consciousness.
We do not mean to be confusing, for we wish you to feel comfortable with our teaching. However, in order to teach with words, we must pretend that each voice within you, or rather each type of voice within you, is separate and can communicate to other voices or types of voices within you. Since the universe itself and all that there is, is within you, it is inevitable that the communication skills we encourage for the healing of incarnation or those whom the healer wishes to serve require a splitting of the perceived self so that communication’s requirement of one to speak and one to listen be fulfilled.
Work in consciousness is largely the moving of energy which is intelligent through violet; then, by intention, from indigo into the blue ray of communication, which then opens the heart, which opened heart may go forth arrayed in the bright colors of love and purified emotion. There is the bringing down of pure light into an intelligible form of communication which carries purified emotion to the relationship which needs healing or, when the self is healer, to the entity to be healed.
Now when the self is engulfed in a difficulty, the heart is defended by thoughts like, “Not trouble again. I can’t stand it. I can’t stand me.” One cannot storm those defenses, so one uses prayer, song, praise and thanksgiving, which, unlike the prayer of the unworthy one, are focused upon the beautiful, the more real, the more true. To say in the midst of sorrow, “Thank you, O beloved Father/Mother. Praise you, O One Who is all,” may seem not only dishonest but irrelevant. But we suggest that you see that this is how the voice of the heart is reached. The direction of the thoughts is changed by the purified emotion taken on faith and expressed in the song, the praise, the thanks, the prayer. Thus, passion is restored to that great seat of purified emotion, purified emotion being the essence of wisdom as opposed to knowledge. The procedure, then, is to suffer; to become aware of the suffering; to pay attention by spending the coin of time; to move purposefully into the prayer, praise, thanksgiving and song, which awakens the heart; to allow this energy to pour into the heart; to allow this potentiated healing energy to move into the relationship which is the conscious focus of the suffering, and then to allow the healing of acceptance and forgiveness to take place.
We of Q’uo confess our own planning ahead. It is not a good time now for us to address how this turning to inspiration can be aided by faith, so we promise on the morrow this shall be addressed by us. For now, we ask you to take it on faith that when you do praise and thank and sing and pray, there is a spirit of Love itself that listens and responds endlessly, fruitfully and fully so that each symptom of the infection called distortion or error or sin may indeed be forgiven.
We would now turn the microphone back to the voice of Barbara, as this entity offers those meditational thoughts of the one known as Aaron. We thank each for this joy of speaking with you; and for now, Adonai. We are those of Q’uo.
Aaron
I am Aaron. I am very grateful to Q’uo for bringing in this topic of faith. It is of great importance and relevance to the subject, and it is my hope that we will both expand the communication on it tomorrow.
Forgiveness is not an event, but a process. You come to a cool lake on the first hot day of spring and desire to swim, to immerse yourself in that cooling water; yet, when you test the water, it is icy cold. With the process of forgiveness, you do not need to leap off the end of the dock into that coolness. You wade in to your ankles. How does it feel? If it feels good, you continue. If it is too cold and you cannot go any further, you stop and try again the next day, and the next and the next. I invite you, then, not to forgive, but to enter into the process of forgiveness.
To begin this process, I would like you to invite one for whom you feel love into your heart and mind, just holding them there before you. No matter how much love there may be between you, you have also caused pain to one another. Speaking that being’s name silently and saying, “I love you, so it is hard to express my anger to you, but you have hurt me by something you did or said or even thought. Intentionally or unintentionally, you have caused me pain. When I look into your heart, I see that you have also known pain. I do not wish to put you out of my heart. I forgive you. I love you, even if there may still be some anger or hurt about that which was said or done. I wish to reconnect our hearts with these words and thoughts. I forgive you. I accept your pain out of which those words or acts arose. I love you.”
I am going to be silent for a minute and ask you to continue this process silently with the one you hold before you, offering whatever words or thoughts feel most appropriate.
[Pause]
Gently now, allow that being to recede from the center of your awareness. In its place, invite in a being from whom you wish forgiveness. Speaking that being’s name to yourself and saying, “I have hurt you through something I said or did or even thought. Intentionally or unintentionally, I have caused you pain and led you to put me out of your heart. It is so painful to be thus separated from you because I love you. Please forgive me. I also have known pain. I do not defend my words or acts, but ask your compassion for my pain, your understanding that the voice within me which spoke was the voice of fear. I admit my irresponsibility in allowing that voice of fear to dominate the voice of love. Forgive me for the ways that I have hurt you. Allow me back into your heart.”
Again, I will be silent for a moment and allow you to work with this yourself, with whatever words feel most appropriate.
[Pause]
Feel that one’s welcomed forgiveness. Feel your energies rejoin. Gently let that being go. Into the space that is left there, please invite yourself—this human that you are, whom you have so often judged so harshly, condemned and put out of your heart. It is so terribly painful to put yourself out of your heart in that way. So much anger, so much fear resides in this human who you are. The loving heart has room for it all. It is the fearful brain that judges and creates separation. The heart welcomes the self back in.
Look at yourself standing there, perched like a deer ready to flee because it expects the voice of judgment which it has heard so often. Speaking your own name to yourself and saying, “When did you last tell yourself, ‘I love you’?” Can you offer that to yourself? Speaking your name and saying, “I love you. Yes, you are not perfect. Yes, you are sometimes reactive, frightened and unskillful. I do not love you because you are perfect. I love you because you are. All of that which I have judged about myself, I invite back into my heart. And I ask that judged part of myself, ‘Can you forgive me the judging as I forgive you your imperfections? Let us be one again. Let us enter wholeness. For whatever ways I have hurt you, can you forgive me for the ways I have judged you? For whatever flaws you have manifest for which I have judged you, as you forgive me for the judging, I forgive you for being human and embrace your humanness.’ It is so painful to feel this separation from myself. May I be whole. May I be healed. For whatever pain I have caused to myself, I offer forgiveness. I forgive you. I love you.”
Again, I will be silent for a minute. Please continue to offer whatever wishes feel most appropriate.
[Pause]
Can you hold this being that you are up before you as one who is truly cherished and beloved? Look at yourself, at how beautiful you are, and offer yourself that love.
May all beings everywhere learn to cherish each other and themselves.
[Bell]
May all beings learn to forgive and experience the grace of being forgiven.
[Bell]
May all beings everywhere find their way home and attain perfect peace.
[Bell]
My deepest love and gratitude to you all. I wish you a goodnight. That is all.